My friend & bridge partner – Mr. Marcel Heming

Marcel Heming had been my friend and bridge partner since last 6 years – since when I retired (in 2007) from active work and he too had retired at that time .   He retired at a younger age -about 54 at that time while I was 67 when I retired.

Unfortunately , we lost my friend recently at a prime age of 59 . He did not wake from his sleep. What God has planned for us is unknown till it happens .

This is how death was announced by his family in the Valley Funeral Home (deep River, Ontario)   website .

—————–

Marcel John Heming

Suddenly, at Deep River on Tuesday, October 23, 2012. Marcel Heming age 59 years. Loving father of John Paul Heming of Ottawa. Dear son of Maria Heming and the late Herman Heming of Thorndale. Loving brother of Marianne Van Geel and her husband Adrian of Lakeside, Adrian Heming and his wife Cheryl of St. Mary”™s, Jim Heming (Nurdan Tokoz) of Kilworth, Ron Heming and his wife Helen of Ingersoll and Greg Heming (Sharron Fletcher) of Thorndale. Friends may call at the Valley Funeral Home, Deep River on Monday from 2-4 and 7-9 p.m. Funeral Service to be conducted in the Chapel on Tuesday at 11:00 a.m. Interment Deep River Community Cemetery. In memoriam donations to the Rotary Club of Renfrew County would be gratefully appreciated.

Marcel John Heming

Born: Wed Apr 22, 1953
Died: Tue Oct 23, 2012

Visiting

2:00 PM to 4:00 PM, Mon Oct 29, 2012
7:00 PM to 9:00 PM, Mon Oct 29, 2012
Location: Valley Funeral Home, Deep River


Funeral Service

11:00 AM Tue Oct 30, 2012

————————-

I wrote an eulogy (as a friend and as his bridge partner) but it remained undelivered at the funeral -due to limited time and it is always helpful and considerate to allow the family (especially his only son – John Paul)   to grieve and speak out his feelings for his dad.   He did deliver a very moving eulogy and spoke about his many memories and proud son to have a caring father.

Here is what I wrote – withheld for a while but now I have decided to publish it on my Web page.

Mr. Marcel Heming         –   Tuesday 23 October 2012

Hi

This is the day I did not expect or envision that I would stand up to mourn the death of my friend, Marcel Heming at his prime age of 59.

Why does he have to go away? He is such a wonderful human being.   This is a “verbatim” quote from my wife – who have had welcomed Marcel in our family circle and spent hours discussing worldly and personal issues with him.

He was younger than me. Many a times, over last few years that I have known him,   I have jokingly teased him for being my son – even though, most appropriately, he was like a younger brother.  

Marcel had a big heart and would go out of his way to be useful to all and anyone asking.

Here is a person who was always active and forthcoming to help out and participate in many a local activities.  Over the years , for local Engineering events, Rotary projects , RiverBank project or setting stage for Deep River plays and others, Marcel remained a very dependable partner in many of such activities in our Community .

Marcel is someone who participates and helps out in any Community project where his contribution is welcome/ accepted . He never looked for any reward from his participation.

Whenever   I am stuck or I need an extra hand , Marcel was always there to lift my burden – and always with a smile and camaraderie . He had an excellent mechanical and analytical mind. He was also very handy in using tools. He was proud to have been raised on a farm under difficult circumstances but that gave him all the good character of being reliable, on time and team work .

It is beyond me to describe the gap he has left in my life. When I retired in 2007 , I came across Marcel as a person – who also had just retired at about that time . It seems that we hit it off well from our first “pow-wow ” between new retirees .

 I had casually asked him about what would be his retirement activities and probed him about whether he would like to play bridge card game . I said I am looking for a partner and he thought that was a good idea though he did not know much as to how to play Bridge at the time . Mind you he was quite proficient in Euchre. But then we together learnt the Bridge techniques and nuances such that many times we did well together whether in the Duplicate bridge or Social bridge – winning kudos .  In fact last year , we were   only ” hair’s breadth” away from achieving the famous Deep River Rounding Trophy for the Duplicate Bridge.   Truly, in fact both of us were a bit relieved that we did not win the Trophy because the right deserving person (Mr. Ian Towner) clinched that.

I am quite at a loss as I think I have lost an excellent  partner and a friend with whom I have had spent many hours since my retirement – whether it was part of structured activities or otherwise just “to shoot the breeze”. Though we kept our own space and remained occupied with individual activities , we were with each other whenever we thought of doing things together .   There was   quite a bit of understanding   of each other’s life and family – we remained supportive   within the limits of proper etiquette between us.

What the fate has in store, one cannot fathom.  

This is the quirk in life that many have to face and with forbearance and the divine strength one needs to pick up the pieces and continue the life.

My and my family’s sincere CONDOLENCES to John Paul and the whole Heming family .  

I would like to end by quoting the following – from one of my friends Mr. Gerhard Fuerst ( an American – and a poet)

We can be supportive of each other!

It simply shows that with an attitude of resolve

and determination you can overcome adversity

and you can rise to the top! It does not have to be: sink or swim.

You paddle hard…you float  whenever necessary…and you master and overcome  

the waves coming your way! You make the best out of any given situation!

God bless Marcel and a happy journey beyond.

Pravin Shah

————————–

Here is the sequence of events he was found at his home –


1) Saturday 20 October 2012 – a tour/visit of the Murray L Moore Hydro Museum In Pembroke.

He was distinctly not feeling well .   Sat down at few places.     I asked him about that and also can I take him to the hospital. He said he is okay – just tired and then had a few minutes of snooze in the car and said he is feeling better and can drive back to Deep River.

When we came back to Deep River at about 4.30pm- his car was in the driveway – so it seemed all is okay . Being weekend – it was normal not to disturb anyone unless anything specific is needed . On Monday 22 October, after we came back from Ottawa ( by the way that day I lost my wallet in Ottawa) – his car was still there in the driveway . This is normal for Marcel. His telephone is not operative due to slow internet connection – only way one can communicate with him is through e-mails .   So I sent him an e-mail on Monday night -asking how is he doing ? No response.  

Next day on Tuesday, I stopped over at his house in the morning about 10.30 am returning from Town completing few errands . Rang the doorbell – no response . After I knocked on the   door – no response.   Sometimes Marcel do not respond if he had fallen asleep or gone for a shower.   Anyway, I thought I will see at Duplicate Bridge in the evening at Lutheran Church on Avon Road. When I arrived at the Duplicate Bridge at about 7.10 pm – I found that Marcel was not there. Everyone was surprised as Marcel is always punctual and also set up the room for Bridge playing . Marcel is the President of the Club – 2nd year running.

Everyone at the Duplicate Club was concerned . So I went away back to his house to find out what happened . Rang the bell, Knocked on the door – no response.   I got really concerned – so I went to the Deep River Police Station . Rest is history.

————————————————-